Setting Healthy Boundaries

Setting boundaries with others may not be an easy task for some. When people hear “setting boundaries” they have the impression that you care “cutting” people off or out of your life. However, it is the complete opposite. Setting boundaries helps you to create an identity for yourself as well as keep your overall wellbeing intact. Boundaries can be either physical or emotional and they can either be too loose or rigid. Boundaries are ways that we communicate our needs to others but also the limit and space that we place between ourselves and others.

When we do not set healthy boundaries anxiety, depression, among other issues can develop. We become physical and emotionally drained when we have had too much but we continue to fight through even though we need a break. The bigger question that comes from the conversation of boundaries is “how do I know if my boundaries are unhealthy?” Often, telling someone “No” can be the hardest thing for us to do; this can be an indication that we have unhealthy boundaries.

Boundaries can be too loose or rigid. Too loose boundaries can take the forms of many things such as: being the fixer for someone else’s problem, enmeshment, the inability to tell someone no, and sharing everything. On the other hand, rigid boundaries can be being guarded, not sharing, cutting others out of your life, not being vulnerable and having high expectations of others.

The goal for setting boundaries is to have healthy boundaries. Healthy can help to create an identify for a person. It also entails knowing and being clear about your needs, saying “no” when you need to, making sure to respect and accept others’ boundaries. Setting healthy boundaries in your personal life, work life and interpersonal relationships can be very beneficial.